In Their Memories: Two sides of one Heart part 2

A/N: this story happens between "a big, crazy rescue" to the beginning of "Replica returns" in the fanfic True Friendship never dies also this story´s ending gives notes to another Memory story, and some old character I long have wanted to appear, but that is a story to another time


even one said to be fully darkness can show some light, just with enough patience and kindness.


ever since he came into the world, the agonizing pain had always been there, the pain of the separation. He was half of Ventus, the dark half and thus, most of his emotions were dark. When he first looked down to the unconscious blond, he felt sad, not sure why though,  was it because he no longer was part of the boy? But that sadness soon changed to a great dislike, for he also saw Ventus as his weakness. He wanted to become strong and that was what Xehanort used to control him. That, and his eternal suffering of uncontrollable emotions. His emotions created the Unversed and he hated them, so he destroyed them. But he quickly realized that killing those monsters only caused him even more pain, he was- is trapped in an evil circle of hurt.
Xehanort told him that the only way to escape from the pain was to fight Ventus and create the X-blade.  It became his goal, it became his life. Xehanort made sure of that, trained him merciless, never giving him any pity, never making it easy to deal with the pain inside his chest or the great loneliness he felt when he felt the warmness Ventus´s friends gave him. Only leaving him colder than ever when the so comforting feeling disappeared, he wanted to cry, but he never did, for tears never helped him. All he could do was to train and trap his hurt inside, becoming the monster Xehanort wanted him to be.

his goal, his dream was shattered the moment the X-blade slid out of his grasp, he disappeared along with Ventus, but unlike the blond who sought safety inside someone else. He was forced to stay in the void, a place where no one could hear you scream.
he was more than happy to get out, and his master putted him to work the instant he was free. He was, once again suffering under his master´s training, but he did not care of the pain anymore. All he wanted was to tear something apart, he got the chance when he met his other half once again. But he was rudely interrupted by something big, powerful and very angry. That firebird forced him into doing something he never thought would happen: working together with Ventus. At first he hated it, then to his own huge surprise, he began enjoying it.
it had been then when it happen, he felt the connection to the blond, for just a moment, stronger than ever before. He felt Ventus light as if it has been his own. He wanted that light more than anything, and he almost, almost cried when it was gone, leaving nothing behind than his cruel companion of hurt.

__

Vanitas lied on a bed inside one of the Mysterious Tower´s rooms, doing nothing than staring at the ceiling and thinking. His body has taken such a beating that he have almost gone limb, every move made it hurt, not to mention moving would open the wounds the firebird gave him.
whatever happened under that fight, something changed, Ventus somehow knew of his suffering and had (to his great annoyance) taken pity on him and brought him to another old keyblade Master named Yin Sid. He barely remember getting inside the tower, he could only remember distance voices, two he did not recognize, but the third, he could. It has been Ventus´s and even though he didn't understand the words, he somehow knew that the boy was worried about him.
Vanitas snorted loudly, finding it both strange and ridicules that the blond have taken pity on him. Knowing how he felt shouldn´t change from the fact of what he did to the blond and his friends.
Vanitas turned around from the sound of a door being opened, however he turned his face back to the wall when seeing who it was. "it´s you" he almost sneered.

"how are you feeling?" Ventus asked kind, doing his best to ignore the rudeness in the raven haired´s reply: "worse now you´re here"
Ventus sighted, still he went further into the room and offered a box with some food he bought in the town "I brought you something to eat, in case you´re hungry"

"I´m not, go away" Vanitas snapped, trying his best ignoring the gnawing hunger in his stomach. his pride refused him to accept food from (in his mind) his worst enemy.
the box with food got placed on a nearby table "I´ll leave it here when you get hungry" Ventus said softly and with that, he left the room.
Vanitas turned to the closing door, having a mix of anger and sadness of this action. in one hand, he still hated the blond and would have nothing to do with him. in the other hand he wanted Ventus, or just someone around, for deep inside, he craved for friends. he knew how it felt like having one, but sadly his years of training with Master Xehanort had turned his loneliness against him. made him trust no one but himself and thus making the raven haired only think of becoming stronger in order to make the X-blade.
'I should´ve known better it wouldn´t work' he thought darkly, still remembering the battle where Ventus defeated him and tore his only hope to salvation out of his grip. was this one of the reasons why he hated Ventus?
he wasn´t sure anymore, it seemed more like he hated everything, even himself.
a deep growl snapped him out of his dark thoughts, his stomach begged for food and even though Vanitas greatly disliked doing it, his hunger was greater than his pride and he went over to the box with food and silently began eating.

Ventus returned again with more food, he was happy that Vanitas have eaten the last one and offered him the next one. again Vanitas turned him down, so the blond left the food on the table. and left the room as the dark haired wanted, once again putting Vanitas in a dilemma of he wanted Ventus to stay or not.  
the ritual continued a few days, Ventus came with food, offered it to the raven haired who would turn it down and tell him to leave. Ventus would then leave the food and leave the room himself, never question him why he kept turning him down. for Ventus already knew, it was weak, but he felt Vanitas pride and hurt gets the better of him and always left in more pain when he left the room.
Ventus did honestly not like this technique of leaving when he knew the raven haired deep inside wanted him to stay.
"why can´t I speak with him?" he asked Yin Sid. "he wants me to stay"

he had told the retired Keyblade master of what happen when he and Vanitas fought together.  understanding why Ventus wanted to help, but the boy did not understand how delicate it was with mending his darker half together again.
Yin Sid mused over these thoughts before replying the young boy "your heart is at the place, but it would be very unwise to rush things with Vanitas"

"why?"

"his heart has been shunned away from light for a very long time" Yin Sid said with closed eyes "he knows how happiness feels through you, but has never been granted the gift himself. because of this, Vanitas has become very vigilant against any form of kindness and will lash out if you haste things" he opened his eyes again, looking Ventus down with his sharp eyes "if you truly wishes to help Vanitas. give him the time he needs, when he is ready to talk. he will let you know"

Ventus haven´t thought of it this way, good thing he brought them here. he bowed down in sign of respect "Understood"

___

the X-blade slid out of his hands, desperate he tried getting the only thing that had the promise of making the pain stop, but the X-blade slipped further and further away as his own strength faded away. with his strength gone, he fell down and the light took him. for the world it would seem he returned back to Ventus, but the truth was that because neither of them accepted the other in any way they was pushed away from one another. Ventus was forced to leave his own body and Vanitas was forced into a place where he couldn´t hurt anyone.

he was trapped in the darkness, but this place wasn't the Realm of Darkness, even that place was livelier and more colorful that this... this void.
everything was pitch black, there was nothing but blackness, no sound, no movements, nothing.
he wanted to get out, but his body was swallowed by the blackness. he didn´t know he still had his body or this was only his mind that was left. even if he still had his body and could move, he did not know how far he could move. all he knew he could was scream, first he screamed in anger, kept making promised that when he got out, Ventus, his friends would suffer. he even wanted to make Xehanort suffer for lying to him about the X-blade. slowly he stopped screaming in anger and hatred, slowly, the blackness began creeping into his mind, driving him to cry for help for the darkness was slowly taking away his sanity. he cried for someone, he didn´t care who to come and help, he did not care who, anyone would be good.
to his surprise and relief, someone came. he could not see them, but he felt an embrace and words that he wouldn´t be alone.
the stranger spoke softly to him, reminded him that even if this seemed like the end, it was only the beginning to a better life. he did not believe in the stranger, yet still he listened to the voice, listened to its stories of always have been watching over him, watching Ventus. he did not like that the voice mentioned Ventus, he did not want Ventus to share this with him. he wanted this to be his and his alone.
"who are you?" he once asked the stranger "how did you know I was here?"

I have always been here.

he did not understand it, what did the stranger mean? he tried questing the voice more, but whoever the voice belonged to wasn´t the brightest. it kept saying that it has always been with him and Ventus, never answering the questing of what it meant, and he got the thoughts that the stranger didn´t know why or how it was here.
also the stranger kept telling him that this hell hole was only the beginning to something better, it was beginning to be annoying, and yet, he slowly began believing it. it was hard not to when the stranger said it as a promise.
his belief was however shaken in the voice when he finally got out. it had been a younger version of Xehanort who let him out and had every attention of letting him know that he easily could throw him back to the void if he disobeyed.

his life did not get better. the pain was still there, Xehanort was still as horrible as always and his hated against Ventus hasn´t faded away as well.

that promise was a lie, just like Xehanort's.

"..are you alright?"

Vanitas eyes snapped open and he stared at Ventus who gave him a very odd look. the raven haired growled, why was Ventus here? it was in middle of the night.
he turned away from the boy, asking icy "why are you here?"

"you were crying"

it was first then he realized that his face was all wet, he cursed of it, he hated showing any form of vulnerability. he dried the tears away, snapping "I´m not crying"

Ventus wanted to tell him it was alright, wanted to remind him that he wasn´t alone, but the words of Yin Sid made him keep his mouth shut. he did not want to hurt Vanitas even more, especially not with something that should be helping him. he nodded slowly, muttering softly "if you say so..." he rose and went towards the door "guess I´ll leave you-"

"wait"

he stopped, both startled and excited of what would happen next. maybe Vanitas would just tell him not to come back, it seemed to be the best possibility of how he has been acting all this time. he turned around to the raven haired, asking kind "something wrong?"

Vanitas looked away, uncertain why he asked the blond to stop. he did not want Ventus to see him like this, but... Ventus did not seems to care. he wanted someone around, but still he refused to show he was weak. what should he do? "I wasn´t crying" he repeated.

Ventus did not answer, already felling disappointed.

"...... stay" Vanitas muttered under his breath, feeling like the request was poisoned. this was against anything his master taught him, then agaim; why should he care about what Xehanort thought?

"what?" Ventus asked, not sure he heard right. he turned further around to Vanitas "what did you say?"

feeling like fallen from being mighty to being pathetic Vanitas snapped angry "I said stay, idiot" remarking angry "but not because we´re friends or anything. in fact, I still hate you"

"...then why do you want me to stay?" Ventus asked confused, that doesn't make any sense.

"fine, then leave. see if I care" and Vanitas turned his back to the blond, doing his best to look angry, while in fact he was sad. he waited for the sound of the door, but it never came. instead, the sound of a chair being pulled and when he turned around. Ventus sat on the said chair and smiled weakly to him.
Vanitas did not show he was grateful for this, but Ventus somehow knew for the face the dark haired gave him was not in a scowl or glare. this time it was natural. Vanitas turned his back to Ventus again, going back to sleep with a small smile on his lips.

Ventus stayed the whole night inside Vanitas´s room and even thought he didn´t barely get any sleep and got an incredible sour back,but it was worth it for Vanitas´s attitude changed a bit to the better. it wasn´t much, but Vanitas was beginning to take the food and even eat with him around. and one day, he began speaking with Ventus. much to the  boy´s surprise and happiness.
at first it was just few remarks, like how stupid he found this situation of him being his worst enemy to suddenly being taken pity on, then to criticize what he did not like about the food he got and how stupid Ventus looked from when he defeated him in the past.
Ventus did at first play very natural, but as time passed and he felt more comfortable around the dark haired, he too began saying his opinion on things.  
one of his favorite discussions was about the Unversed´s appearance and what emotions they embodied.
much to Vanitas´s dismay.


"what about the one that looks like a bunny?"

"sorrow, and it does NOT looks like a bunny!"

"I think it does, did it get that form because you felt sorrow of you couldn´t get a bunny?"

"no! its form has nothing to do with the emotions it embody, idiot."

"but you made the form right, you said that yourself when you explained that when I asked about the Scrapper"

"ugh.. alright I made that form, but it is not a bunny! get it into your thick skull already?"

"then what does it looks like then?"

"I don´t know! would you leave me alone with it already?!"

"what about Dark Lightning? it looks like a cat"
Dark Lightning was, according to Vanitas quite an unusual Unversed. that Unversed did not embody one single emotions, but many and seems to be affected by both Vanita´s and Ventus´s moods. most of the time. the Unversed was playfully and free spirited, but could get just as spiteful as its master, not that it did listen. Dark Lightning was the only Unversed that did not follow Vanita´s every command. it sort of did what it wanted.

Vanitas snorted, well knowing that he wasn´t the only one who created that unusual Unversed "you are the cause of that"

"you mean I´m affecting the Unversed?" Ventus asked pretty obvious and thought out loud, "would explain why some of them looks so silly" he did no longer seeing those creatures as monsters, mostly because those around never attacked anyone.

"Ventus?"

Ventus turned away from Vanitas oblivious that the raven haired shot lasers at him from the remark of his Unversed. the blond boy looked to the door where the voice came from.  
"Mickey!" he smiled big and leaped over to the small king. happy to see an old friend again.

Mickey smiled back to the blond, however it faded as he glanced to the raven haired boy who pouted annoyed on the bed. he did know Vanitas was here, Mickey was at the tower when Ventus brought him here and even now, he still did not fancy the idea having the dark hearted boy around. "could I speak with you for a moment" Mickey asked, not comfortable speaking around Vanitas. he accepted him of not attacking without warning, but that was as far that went.

Vanitas knew exactly the reason and gave the small king a glare, which Mickey acted like he didn´t notice, but the small king did look like he was ready to call his keyblade.

"uh, sure" Ventus nodded, confused over this, having no idea of the tension between the king and Vanitas. he gave Vanitas one look, before following Mickey outside.
outside the tower, Mickey asked "you haven´t forgotten what he has done, right?"

"of course not" Ventus shook his head. he never have and never will, but he couldn´t keep blaming Vanitas for something he didn´t really have control over. "but he has change, he may not admit it, but I have seen it" he has seen that behind the tough and rude attitude, Vanitas has a caring side.
"he actually kinda fun talking to, when you get used to his rude remarks" he added chuckling with hands behind his head.

"gosh, I would´ve never thought it would´ve been possible" Mickey admitted, when he heard from Yin Sid that he would allow Vanitas to stay. he feared the worst, never once thinking that Ventus would be helping the boy who almost killed him in the Keyblade Graveyard.
he smiled weakly up to the boy "I admit I still have my doubts, but I trust you know what you´re doing"

"thanks Mickey" Ventus smiled, the smile faded a little of a question that quite for a while weighed on his mind "any news about Terra?"

"....sorry Ven..."


up in the tower Vanitas watched from the star formed window Ventus head and shoulder drop in disappointment, he did not hear the words but from the sadness and disappointment vibe he got from the other ones heart. Vanitas had a good guess it was about his friends.
a small twit told that the only friendly Unversed Vanitas ever has created has come over to him.
"it is always about his friends" he sneered down to the Flood that looked like it has been mixed with at cat.
he felt angry. he wasn´t really sure why. Ventus did tell him that his friends was part of their heart and they was a part of his. but he was a bigger part of the blond´s heart, he was half of it, and he saw no place for Terra and Aqua. Vanitas did not want to have anything to do with Terra and Aqua, he only wanted to have anything to do with Ventus. he would never admit it, but he was beginning to care for the blond, and the more he began to care and open up to Ventus, the less pain he felt. he knew what it was, he have felt it from Ventus when he was surrounded by Terra and Aqua. it was friendship, and that friendship; created Dark Lightning, one of the reasons why it haven´t been destroyed.
he has become friends with Ventus and he wanted to keep Ventus for himself, he wouldn´t share this friendship with any others, not even Terra and Aqua.


Ventus blinked of something dark he felt, he looked up to the tower and saw Vanitas was looking out from one of the windows, looking both angry and sad. it took him a while to figure out what the dark feeling was, for he haven´t felt it before himself. Vanitas was jealous, but why was he jealous? he could only feel the other boy, not read his mind. would´ve been easier to figure the raven haired out if he could.

Mickey followed the blond´s eyes and noticed Vanitas as well "he don´t look happy"

"no, he isn´t" Ventus admitted and added to the small king "and I´m going to figure out what is bothering him"

"promise you be careful, he might have changed, but he´s still dangerous" Mickey called

Ventus promised he would.and yet, he saw no reason to promise. he did not fear Vanitas anymore, so he had no worries when he confronted Vanitas later that day of why he was so angry?
at first Vanitas refused to tell, but with a few push, the raven haired almost exploded.

"it have always been about you and your friends, nothing else matters! you don´t want to be around me anyway, you only stick around because of your pathetic bleeding heart! if you want them around so much, then why don´t you leave?!!"

okay, so that´s why he so angry. Ventus still got taken by surprise by the other ones sudden angry outbursts but thankfully, his own mild temper helped him looking through Vanitas´s anger and see the problem. "so you´re jealous at my friends?"

Vanitas snorted like a angry child "no" he lied, it was almost funny if not this one could easily put a keyblade through your skull. a confused twit from the friendly Unversed made Vanitas go a little more into the details of why he was angry.
"I just can´t see why you gets so upset about them all the time. what do they do other than hold you back?"

that was an easy one "they make me happy" Ventus replied.

yellow eyes turned to him, they were still angry, but there was something else in them too. longing?
"happy" Vanitas repeated as if he didn´t understand. he turned away again, looking at the sleeping Unversed, asking as if he didn´t care "that´s all?"

"how long do you want the list?" Ventus softly retorted. he got a odd stare from Vanitas and he said to the raven haired  with a sight "Aqua and Terra are like a brother and sister to me, they has been there for as long as I can remember. true, they both can be very overprotective at times, but they only do that because they love me and don´t want me to get hurt." he eyed Vanitas who once again kept his eyes on him, watching with the natural face, showing he had his full attention on him. "Aqua is out there, looking for Terra and I wish to help, I promised Terra that I would be there for him."

"you do realize that Terra can´t be saved?" Vanitas asked sharply

Ventus shook his head, smiling "I saved you, so Terra can be saved too"
Vanitas´s eyes got almost twice as big, from those words. Ventus wanted to help Terra, that was certain yet he spend precious time helping Vanitas, he saw the raven haired as a friend, even as a brother he lost years ago. he have never said it to Vanitas in fear it would break the thin line of friendship between them. "you´re my friend too." nodding towards Dark Lightning "and you see me as one as well, Dark Lightning is the prove of that, right Dark?" he asked and smiled to the Unversed whose lightning shaped antenna twitched slightly in response.

Vanitas turned away, snorting "don´t get mushy over me Blondie" but he couldn´t hide the small smile on his face.

"heh, sorry" Ventus smiled with hands behind his head and even he saw the smile, he did not mention it, for Vanitas could retort with his keyblade if he got too annoyed.
still he was really beginning to worry about Terra, who knows what Xehanort was doing with him. he wanted Vanitas to come with him, but from that outburst, he wasn´t sure if Vanitas wanted to help him finding Terra and even fight his old master.
"Van" he lowered his hands, no longer smiling "come with me"

"what, and help you save your friend?" Vanitas asked, adding rude "I don´t think so"

Ventus head dropped, he knew it might come for this. he was forced to chose, and it was hard. he did not want to ruin the new friendship with Vanitas, but he couldn´t abandon the one he saw as his older brother either. "I´m sorry, I wish it didn´t have to come to this." he said and told the dark hearted boy that he would leave the tower the next morning.

"yeah, yeah, whatever" Vanitas brushed him off, not as all faced by the thought of him leaving. ironically, Vanitas thought that Ventus only said it to make him run after him, he never thought that the blond meant he would leave.
but even the small cat looking Unversed knew that was one big fat mistake. it made a pouting whistle, turned into a small screech as its owner throw a book at it.
"shut it" Vanitas snorted.

the next day, Vanitas watched the other boy thanking Yin Sid,and after giving Vanitas a 'I´m sorry' look, he left the tower.
Vanitas stubbornly acted like he didn´t care when he actually did and didn´t want the blond to leave.  
an hour after Ventus have left and Yin Sid approaching the raven haired boy who had all the time starred out from the window with a pretty impatience Dark Lightning beside him, almost like it was waiting for Vanitas to realize that Ventus wasn´t coming back. but the raven haired kept stubbornly this going and there was nothing the cat sized Unversed could do about it.

"he will return" Vanitas told himself, which wasn´t the first time he had said it in this stupid form of a waiting game.

Yin Sid mused deeply, went over to the boy and said calmly "you know very well that´s a lie"

"Terra is lost" Vanitas snapped back "nothing can bring him back!"

the old keyblade Master wasn´t faced by the anger of the boy, he kept his eyes to the realm outside "Ventus thought that too when he brought you here"
the boy blinked of those words, not sure what this have to do with Terra. Yin Sid continued, still not looking at the boy "he knew how you felt, but did not know how to mend the pain Xehanort had inflicted on you. there was a moment he believed that anyone Xehanort has been near never would recover, then you began to heal." he eyed the boy "you became his beacon of hope that Terra can be saved"

...what? he was the whole source of Ventus kept on believing that Terra could be saved? that´s stupid!
"I´m nothing like Terra. he´s under Xehanorts control"

Dark Lightning gave him a look that did said 'and you weren´t?'

Vanitas never got Xehanort´s heart inside of him, still he was under the man´s control for several years. Ventus might think that Terra can be saved, but Xehanort would squash him like a bug before he even got the chance of getting Terra back. someone have to keep that runt safe, only one problem: his so called friends had no idea where he was....
"dang it..!" Vanitas growled.

"you know what to do" Yin Sid said. still keeping his eyes to the realm outside, but he knew what Vanitas was leaving from the sound of stomping footsteps and a ordering the small Unversed to follow. moments later, the sound of a dark portal could be heard.
"good luck" the sorcerer mused.




---


after some time after Vanitas have left to search for Ventus, the retired Keyblade Master turned around. for someone else has stepped inside the tower. he eyed person once and said mostly to himself "I have been wondering when you would return"


"it´s been long, but I´m back" the figure said, being almost the same size as Mickey, except the ears was longer, body more ribbit like instead of mouse and the clothing was blue instead of red. he added with eyes away from the sorcerer "I met someone named Sora and some of his friends"

Yin Sid mused turned to the figure, asking "and what do you make of Sora?"
and the stranger said with a smirk "he´s truly a special case"


"I´m glad you like him Oswald"